I have felt myself change in the last few weeks. A change of heart, a change of mind...a change. I am truely tired of being overweight. And I can remember that I'm tired of this feeling every moment of every day, and rather than being tired and depressed I am determined and hopeful.
I had a good week this week, lost over 2 lbs, which is slow going but a healthy rate to loose at.
I am turning a page; I'm done with not controlling myself. It's a long journey but it's going to be a good one.
Sunday, September 23, 2007
Wednesday, September 12, 2007
The Biggest Loser
Isn't it funny how a television show can change the meaning of a label? Suddenly everyone wants to be the Biggest Loser, suddenly people are chearing others on to be the Biggest Loser. All over the world people are having contests to see who the Biggest Loser is...amazing.
I watched the season premier of The Biggest Loser last night. It was amazing. Those people were just working their little tails off, and what a humbling experience to see your weight on a scale in front of hundreds/thousands/millions of people.
I don't like that when someone "only" lost 7 lbs her first week she was considered a slacker. I realize that these people are working out full-time, surrounded with fitness help and healthy eating advice, so their losses are going to be...amazing, but also a bit unrealistic for the rest of us.
So, I encourage your to be encouraged by these loosers. But also realize that you won't be able to, nor should you be expected to, loose that much weight in a weeks time...that is unless you have time to work out 8 hours a day!
Cheer for these big loosers, and become a looser yourself, that is what I've decided to do.
By the way, I set my alarm an hour earlier this morning, bound and determined to work out before work. I actually got up, but a quick illness kept me from doing it (big bummer). I'm proud of getting out of bed atleast!
I went to the doctor, hopefully I'll get this health stuff cleared up so I can work out and become a big not-fat looser!
I watched the season premier of The Biggest Loser last night. It was amazing. Those people were just working their little tails off, and what a humbling experience to see your weight on a scale in front of hundreds/thousands/millions of people.
I don't like that when someone "only" lost 7 lbs her first week she was considered a slacker. I realize that these people are working out full-time, surrounded with fitness help and healthy eating advice, so their losses are going to be...amazing, but also a bit unrealistic for the rest of us.
So, I encourage your to be encouraged by these loosers. But also realize that you won't be able to, nor should you be expected to, loose that much weight in a weeks time...that is unless you have time to work out 8 hours a day!
Cheer for these big loosers, and become a looser yourself, that is what I've decided to do.
By the way, I set my alarm an hour earlier this morning, bound and determined to work out before work. I actually got up, but a quick illness kept me from doing it (big bummer). I'm proud of getting out of bed atleast!
I went to the doctor, hopefully I'll get this health stuff cleared up so I can work out and become a big not-fat looser!
Monday, September 10, 2007
Diet Coke and Cinnamelts Please....
I packed up my son and headed into town; I was going to get drive-thru. The whole time I was battling in my head what I should get and what I shouldn't get and how it was silly for me to be paying for food when I didn't really want something.
So, I did what every reasonable person would that is trying to loose weight, I drove through the golden arches, got a diet coke, and a chicken sandwich (fried), fries, and oh, yeah, cinnamelts.
Ridiculous.
I am going to give up fast food. No kidding.
You have probably wondered where I am, how my weight loss is going. I must say that I am still in the same place I have been for years, frustrated and with little faith in myself. I have gained weight, yeah, gained, and have been half-heartedly battling the bulge ever since I last posted.
I kept thinking, I need to post again. Then I thought, what would I post about? That I have a ton of people holding me accoutable, cheering for me, praying for me, yet I still fail? That, I got a new scale, started rewarding myself for working out, and started meeting with two wonderful women every Saturday morning, yet I still fail? Cried to myself, cried to my husband, cried with my husband, cried to God, yet I still fail?
I am so so very sick of this battle. It is a long long road, but I'm sick of loosing.
more to come, hopefully about success.
So, I did what every reasonable person would that is trying to loose weight, I drove through the golden arches, got a diet coke, and a chicken sandwich (fried), fries, and oh, yeah, cinnamelts.
Ridiculous.
I am going to give up fast food. No kidding.
You have probably wondered where I am, how my weight loss is going. I must say that I am still in the same place I have been for years, frustrated and with little faith in myself. I have gained weight, yeah, gained, and have been half-heartedly battling the bulge ever since I last posted.
I kept thinking, I need to post again. Then I thought, what would I post about? That I have a ton of people holding me accoutable, cheering for me, praying for me, yet I still fail? That, I got a new scale, started rewarding myself for working out, and started meeting with two wonderful women every Saturday morning, yet I still fail? Cried to myself, cried to my husband, cried with my husband, cried to God, yet I still fail?
I am so so very sick of this battle. It is a long long road, but I'm sick of loosing.
more to come, hopefully about success.
Tuesday, May 29, 2007
Embarassed to be in Indiana
I went to Indiana this weekend to visit with my husband's family. It was a fun weekend. We stayed at a beautiful park (www.springmillin.com), went swimming, had a reunion, and caught up with everyone. But, at times I found myself dreading the trip, and then, once we were there, dreading seeing everyone.
I realized on Saturday it was because of my weight. I am just so heavy now that I hate the way I look. I feel like everyone is judging me. When I walk away, I fear that they all whisper, "wow, Sara has put on a lot of weight since we saw her last." I fear that because that is exactly what I would think/say.
Oh the irony.
I told my wonderful husband that I was sometimes uncomfortable around his family. At first I said it was because I still didn't know all of them that well. But as I sat in our dark hotel room, flipping through the TV channels I faced my own reality. I am embarassed of me. I am uncomfortable because of me.
So, on the drive home I told him by this time next year I want to be thinner...a lot thinner (there were some other goals too but they are private).
Skinny Sara has fun in Indiana
my 2008 blog title:)
I realized on Saturday it was because of my weight. I am just so heavy now that I hate the way I look. I feel like everyone is judging me. When I walk away, I fear that they all whisper, "wow, Sara has put on a lot of weight since we saw her last." I fear that because that is exactly what I would think/say.
Oh the irony.
I told my wonderful husband that I was sometimes uncomfortable around his family. At first I said it was because I still didn't know all of them that well. But as I sat in our dark hotel room, flipping through the TV channels I faced my own reality. I am embarassed of me. I am uncomfortable because of me.
So, on the drive home I told him by this time next year I want to be thinner...a lot thinner (there were some other goals too but they are private).
Skinny Sara has fun in Indiana
my 2008 blog title:)
Wednesday, May 23, 2007
The Beck Diet Solution
Hello all~
I started reading a new book last night called the Beck Diet Solution. Other people that I know (virtually) have been reading and commenting on it so I decided to give it a try. It's a really interesting book so far.
The book will work with any healthy diet, which is nice. The premise is that people are not successful dieters because they never learned how to think as a thin person. The writer is open and honest about what you will have to do in order to loose weight and keep it off.
I like honesty.
For example, she said you will always have to eat a restricted diet. Bummer....
But, she also states that through the exercises in her book you will learn to want to eat a restricted diet vs. feeling deprived. You will enjoy not feeling overly full or knowing you are making the right choices.
She also stated that most thin people restrict their diet. They might not think about it because it happens very naturally for them, but they do it. I started thinking of all my "thin" friends and I would agree with that.
So, I'm hoping to Think Like A Thin Person. I'll let you know how it goes.
This week on the diet has been going pretty well, though I may be fooling myself because the scale is not agreeing with me.
I started reading a new book last night called the Beck Diet Solution. Other people that I know (virtually) have been reading and commenting on it so I decided to give it a try. It's a really interesting book so far.
The book will work with any healthy diet, which is nice. The premise is that people are not successful dieters because they never learned how to think as a thin person. The writer is open and honest about what you will have to do in order to loose weight and keep it off.
I like honesty.
For example, she said you will always have to eat a restricted diet. Bummer....
But, she also states that through the exercises in her book you will learn to want to eat a restricted diet vs. feeling deprived. You will enjoy not feeling overly full or knowing you are making the right choices.
She also stated that most thin people restrict their diet. They might not think about it because it happens very naturally for them, but they do it. I started thinking of all my "thin" friends and I would agree with that.
So, I'm hoping to Think Like A Thin Person. I'll let you know how it goes.
This week on the diet has been going pretty well, though I may be fooling myself because the scale is not agreeing with me.
Thursday, May 17, 2007
RESISTANT To Change
All~
I got my blood work results back. I had high cholesterol...including high bad cholesterol, and high insulin levels. The doctor is putting me on some medicine for the insulin. I'm not diabetic...not yet anyway.
It is time to bet my butt in gear and change...no joking around anymore and thinking I'm young and I can do anything and that I carry my weight well and that I am heavy but healthy.
I am pretty sure I am insulin resistant...what does that mean? Well, from what I've read it means you have high insulin, but you are not diabetic. If left alone it can turn into type 2 diabetes. Symptoms include-weight gain, fatigue, weight gain around your abdomen, hard time loosing weight, craving sugar and high-carb items, and some other things. I have all of that.
I go on medicine for 1 month to try and get my weight down and insulin and chloresterol under control.
I am 27
I am too young for this.
I got my blood work results back. I had high cholesterol...including high bad cholesterol, and high insulin levels. The doctor is putting me on some medicine for the insulin. I'm not diabetic...not yet anyway.
It is time to bet my butt in gear and change...no joking around anymore and thinking I'm young and I can do anything and that I carry my weight well and that I am heavy but healthy.
I am pretty sure I am insulin resistant...what does that mean? Well, from what I've read it means you have high insulin, but you are not diabetic. If left alone it can turn into type 2 diabetes. Symptoms include-weight gain, fatigue, weight gain around your abdomen, hard time loosing weight, craving sugar and high-carb items, and some other things. I have all of that.
I go on medicine for 1 month to try and get my weight down and insulin and chloresterol under control.
I am 27
I am too young for this.
Thursday, May 10, 2007
Going to Get some blood work
Hi all,
So sorry I haven't been on for a while. Things are going ok. Last weeks weigh in I lost 1 lb, which is great because I did not expect to loose anything.
I saw my doctor about my weight troubles and she ordered some blood work. I'm going to get my insulin tested (diabetes runs in the family), glucose tolerance, and thyroid (also runs in the family). I'll let you know how it goes.
On one hand I'm hoping something shows up so that I'll know why I'm having such a hard time loosing weight. On the other hand I do not want anything to show up because it may mean a lifetime commitment to taking medicine. So, I am torn.
My friend the other day suggested that I come up with things to keep me motivated...like how my back hurts and I don't want it to anymore...or I want to run around with my son and not be tired....I'm trying to come up with a good, honest list for that.
So sorry I haven't been on for a while. Things are going ok. Last weeks weigh in I lost 1 lb, which is great because I did not expect to loose anything.
I saw my doctor about my weight troubles and she ordered some blood work. I'm going to get my insulin tested (diabetes runs in the family), glucose tolerance, and thyroid (also runs in the family). I'll let you know how it goes.
On one hand I'm hoping something shows up so that I'll know why I'm having such a hard time loosing weight. On the other hand I do not want anything to show up because it may mean a lifetime commitment to taking medicine. So, I am torn.
My friend the other day suggested that I come up with things to keep me motivated...like how my back hurts and I don't want it to anymore...or I want to run around with my son and not be tired....I'm trying to come up with a good, honest list for that.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)